I miss writing to you here. I miss my conversation to the you that I imagined, whom I conjured up for myself to sooth me into believing that what I thought we had was real. I’m not so sure anymore. There is something that’s missing, something that’s odd. You re not who you used to be. You don’t dream of us anymore. You broke something inside of you to keep yourself away from us. It’s heartbreaking to see. I wish there was a language to explain it. But I can’t seem to find that language. It feels like I’m babbling on but you are far away and you don’t understand what I’m saying. In the end, everyone is a universe by themselves. I thought our universes collapsed and the firey eruptions that followed merged us together into conjoined universes where we had a common ground, a common shared love that we could manifest to one another. Was I just dreaming? Was I wrong to trust myself? I don’t know. It’s all too difficult now. You are far away, and although in less than 48 hours you’ll be here, I’m afraid you’ll always stay away, in the distance. Your brilliance, amazing personality, goals and fears all far away, unshared with me, us. As we part ways I see you fading away in the distance and I miss you. I miss our times, our beautiful, magnificent times together. Times when I truly loved living.